Breaking Tradition

mona-lisa-smile

More people are getting married during ages between 22 to 25 in Shantou. Like my Mum usual told a girl that when she is under 25, she can choose what man she wants to marry, because men are prefer young girls generally. However, it is a tradition that women reply on men and being passive. It is like hundreds years ago in the West, and it still exists that women grow up as a passive images to be chosen by men. As silly as my Mum, they don’t see women as intelligent as men, as long as women can find a good husband.

Nowadays, female have equal education and occupation choices and they don’t have to reply on searching men to get married because they are ‘young’. On the opposite, there are many failure marriages because of marrying too young or married the wrong one. When they are young, they have not experience enough and made a rush choice to be with someone. People should know whether they have ability to create a new family. It does exist that people are too young to marry a wrong one. Of course I also see many people had their happy marriages. I do think women are smart and capable to choose what they want, and whether they want to marry or not, regardless the age issues or social pressure either judgement.

Different people have different ideas about the issue. despite age or gender issues, this is about breaking tradition. It’s different valuation to choose. if something you choose for sure, keep walking on to search your happiness without complaining because it is your choice.

The reason inspired me to write this article is the movie Mona Lisa Smile which showed women were try to break through the tradition. The main character was a teacher, and her personality was influenced her female students. Instead of getting married after graduation, the female students can do whatever they want to achieve in their life, not just focus on marriage. Ideally we hope women can be a good wife and be successful in their career as well.

打破传统

在汕头,很多人22-25岁就结婚生孩子。就象我妈妈常我们说,一个女孩子在25岁之前就可以选男人,25岁之后就是男人选你了。因为男人永远喜欢年轻的女孩子,年轻就是你的皇牌!这让我觉得为什么女人永远处于被动,男人总是主载女人的权利,就象几百年前西方国家的生活一样,传统的男人为住,女人为附,而我们在重复着他们的步伐。

现代社会,女人和男人拥有一样的教育权利,有机会一起在工作上竞争。女人有更多选择的空间,毕业之后,不止是为了结婚生孩子,因为为了乘年轻嫁个好老公。相反之中,很多人嫁错郎因为年少无知,父母要他们乘年轻结婚,结婚之后才知道两人不合,太冲动而结婚,没有能力组织一个新家庭。当然,组织新家庭并不容易,我也见证很多成功的婚姻。我相信女人和男人一样聪明,有能力去主宰她们的生活。女人是否几时结婚,不需要以年龄,或社会的压力来决定,是她们自己决定她们想和她所爱的人成立一个家。

不同的人有不同的意见吧,女人们能打破传统,突破年龄问题或是性别歧视或社会的压力是很不容易的。生活价值的不同观决定人不同的命运,假如你选择了一条你自己决定的路,不要后悔,勇往直前走下去,不要抱怨,因这是你选择的道路。

我有这个‘打破传统‘的想法其实是自己的性格就比较独立反叛,看到电影(蒙娜丽莎的微笑)讲着一个女老师能打破传统,因当时的社会毕业后就结婚,她选择了她想要做的事情,而不是传统的结婚生孩子,而这启发了她很多快毕业的学生。电影简单感人。理想中我们希望能做个成功的妻子/妈妈兼优秀的事业女性。

Black and White

a-white-lady

You might think “black and white” party? No, there is an interesting topic about different about complexion in China and the West.

My western friends keep asking me “ why the Chinese always like taking the umbrella wherever sunshine is coming out?” people like be tanned or have a brown skin in the west. On the opposite, people in mainland China prefer their skin to look very white even like pale. There are several reasons for that. The big reason for white skin because Chinese men like women to look white. If women look white, it means they are week and innocent and men can protect them. The others reason is that white skin means they are rich, dark skin means they are working outdoors all the time, not an properly ladies.

However, in the west, people like to be tanned a lot and it represents healthy and fashion. It means people have more time for outdoors or on holidays and it is a rich symbol.

The same thought has appeared in most cultures. Hundreds of years ago it was a sign of beauty in Europe for a woman to be white, and this was for the exact same reasons: being white implied you were not working class, being dark implied you were a worker. At that time women used to apply all sorts of dangerous chemicals to their face to make it whiter. Queen Elizabeth I is famous for wearing lead powder, a chemical that we now know as being toxic to humans.

I’m sure the same will happen in China and over time having a tan will be a sign of wealth.

黑白主题

是否想到黑白派队呢?不是哦,是一个关于西方和中国喜欢不同肤色的主题。很多西方朋友问我,为什么中国人每当太阳出来就撑起雨伞呢?欧洲西方国家人们喜欢棕色的皮肤,而相反来说,中国人喜欢白皙的皮肤,主要的原因是中国男人喜欢白皙皮肤的女人,代表天真纯洁软弱,他们可以保护;二来白皙皮肤代表富贵的象征,假如棕色的皮肤,代表你是农民阶层,不是上流社会,白领的女人。

相反来说,西方国家喜欢棕色的皮肤,代表健康和时尚,同时也代表人们富裕的象征,有多余的钱去度假,晒太阳,享受生活,是有钱的象征!其实同样的事情发生在大多数的文化背景中。几百年前的欧洲,上流社会名媛白皙皮肤就是时尚与身份的象征。这也是同样的理由你不是工人阶级。伊丽莎白一代皇后就喜欢超级白皙的皮肤,涂上很多有毒的白皙化妆品,而这些漂白的化妆品而却是致癌的。

时代的变化,我相信不久的将来中国人也喜欢棕色的皮肤,同时也是代表富裕和健康。